


Business as Usual

by mosaic915



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Angst and Feels, Dom/sub Undertones, F/M, Femdom, Height Differences, Light Angst, Missing Scene, One Shot, Rating: PG13, Season/Series 02
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-07
Updated: 2021-02-07
Packaged: 2021-03-12 06:13:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,349
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29255754
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mosaic915/pseuds/mosaic915
Summary: While quarantined on a planet with a deadly virus, Chakotay admitted his feelings to Captain Janeway and they began to explore their new relationship. But now that they have been cured and returned to Voyager, they both know it can't last...Takes place at the end of episode 2x25 "Resolutions"
Relationships: Chakotay/Kathryn Janeway
Comments: 23
Kudos: 57





	Business as Usual

**Author's Note:**

> So... I haven't written fanfic in years and I've never written in the Star Trek fandom before. But I adored this episode of Voyager and this idea wouldn't leave me alone, so here you go. I hope you enjoy it.
> 
> Full disclosure - I'm currently watching through Voyager for the first time and I am only through season 2, so I have no idea if this is canon-compliant for the entire series.

Chakotay followed Captain Janeway out of sick bay, still a little nauseated from the antidote the Doctor had administered that morning. As grateful as he was for the crew’s efforts in rescuing the two of them, part of him wished that he was still on the surface below, holding Kathryn as she fell asleep in his arms.

But no. She wasn’t Kathryn anymore. She was Captain Janeway again, and she strode down the corridor ahead of him, clearly ready to get back to business as usual. She smiled and nodded at various crew members as they passed her with a quick “Glad you’re back, Captain” or “Good to see you again, Captain.”

Then they turned a corner toward the turbolift, and it was just the two of them in the corridor. This might be his only chance to be alone with her before they were thrust back into their routine lives… and he wouldn’t waste it.

Chatokay cleared his throat. “Captain?”

She barely glanced over her shoulder at him. “Yes, Commander?”

“I need to speak with you.”

“What’s on your mind?” She didn’t slow her pace. The turbolift was within meters of them now.

Chatokay closed the distance between them with a few quick steps and reached for her. He grasped her hand and turned her around to face him. Her eyes widened as he looked up at him, neck craned to meet his eye. Her fingers didn’t close around his like they did yesterday.

“We need to talk about what happens now, Captain.” He paused. “Kathryn.” His thumb traced slow circles on the back of her hand.

“You had it right the first time,” she replied. She reached across her body with her free hand and captured his wrist. She pulled his hand away from hers and released him. “You now what happens now, Commander.”

She turned again and continued into the turbolift. Chakotay’s face hardened. That wasn’t good enough. She’s the one who started this conversation back on the planet, and he was going to make sure she finished it properly.

He slipped into the turbolift just before the doors closed.

“Bridge,” ordered Captain Janeway and turned her body away from him. As the turbolift surged into motion, the captain swayed a little and pressed a hand against the wall. Chakotay gently grasped her elbow to steady her.

“Doc said the nausea should pass in about an hour,” he said softly.

“Yes, thank you, Commander. I recall what the Doctor said,” she retorted, closing her eyes and inhaling deeply through her nose.

Chakotay felt a rush of affection for her. And in its wake, all his harsh words demanding a better resolution to what they’d been through melted away.

“Captain?” he asked. She opened her eyes but said nothing in response. But she hadn’t pulled her elbow away from his grip; Chakotay tried not to let that fact fill him with hope.

“Do you really intend to ignore everything that happened between us down there?”

“Computer, freeze turbolift.” The movement around them stilled; the whirring silenced.

“What do you expect me to do, Chakotay?” Captain Janeway continued. “Is this what you want?”

Suddenly, she had him by the back of the neck and was pulling his face down to hers. She kissed him fiercely and he opened his mouth to hers. His arms slipped around her waist, enveloping her, consuming her. He knew what strength lay within her petite frame--strength of body and mind and character. Deep within him, he knew that strength of character would not allow her to continue their relationship now that they were back on Voyager. He sighed into her mouth and let himself drown in her, knowing it would be the last time.

The captain pushed her body against his, rotating them so his back was to the curved wall of the turbolift. She pressed him into it and slid her fingers up his neck, dug them into his hair. He moaned as she gripped his head and pulled him away from her.

“Is this what you want?” she gruffly repeated, her eyes sharp and intense on his. “Because it’s all I can give you. A stolen moment in a turbolift. A holodeck program we’d pray no one walked in on. A half-assed excuse for an away mission alone.”

He swallowed hard and watched her eyes move down to where his Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat. Keeping his head pulled back, she closed her mouth around it. Chakotay gasped and almost said _yes_.

 _Yes_ , this is what he wanted. He had told her the truth on the planet, couched though it was in story and metaphor. He wanted to put her needs first. He wanted to serve her. He wanted her to take him and command him. He wanted to say _yes_.

But he also wanted something else. He wanted the warrior by his side. He wanted the woman he could hold at night. He wanted all of her. And he knew that wasn’t an option. Not anymore.

 _Yes_ , he wanted this. But _no_ , he wanted more.

He wouldn’t lie to his captain. And he couldn’t lie to Kathryn. So he said nothing at all.

“That’s what I thought,” the captain muttered into his throat. She pulled her lips from Chakotay’s neck and loosened her grip on his hair. But she didn’t let him go yet.

Chakotay could read the sorrow in her eyes when she looked up at him. Despite how no-nonsense she was, Captain Janeway was a woman who wore her heart on her sleeve.

“I can’t give you what you want, Chakotay,” she said gently. “You know I can’t. We may be 70 years from the Federation, but there are certain things a Starfleet captain cannot do under any circumstances. I’m sorry.”

Captain Janeway let her fingers go slack and slid her hands down to rest on his chest. She dropped her heels--he hadn’t even realized she was on her tiptoes--and placed her head between her hands on his sternum. Chakotay could feel the warmth of her breath through his uniform. He wrapped his arms around her again and embraced her.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered again.

After a few moments, she hadn’t moved. Perhaps she couldn’t bring herself to step away. The captain was the toughest person Chakotay had ever met, but everyone had their limits. Chakotay wished he could stand there and hold her as long as she would let him, but they would be missed soon--if they weren’t already. And someone was going to need this turbolift sooner or later.

So if she couldn’t do it, he could do it for her. He cleared his throat.

“Resume.”

The computer trilled in acquiescence and the turbolift continued on its way to the bridge. As if a spell had been broken, Captain Janeway’s hands tightened against Chatokay’s chest and she pushed against him to move away. She ran her hands along her hair, smoothing away any evidence of what had just happened.

“Thank you, Commander,” she said, barely above a whisper.

“Anything you need, Captain,” he responded, throwing a cautious glance in her direction.

She turned to him and offered him a sad smile. “You know there’s no one else I’d rather have by my side, don’t you, Chakotay?”

“Yes, Captain.” He returned her smile with one of his own. “I know.”

She reached across the turbolift and squeezed Chakotay’s shoulder--an affectionate gesture she often used with her crew. Yes, she was his captain again, and he her first officer.

The turbolift doors whooshed open, and all eyes turned to them. Their faces lit up with joy at their return… most of their faces, anyway.

“Welcome back, Captain, Commander,” Tuvok said, stoic as ever.

The captain immediately launched into a teasing conversation with Tuvok and then commanded Paris to continue on their course back home. She and Chakotay took their seats and fell back into the rhythm of the bridge. To the crew, it must have looked as if everything was back to normal. For Chakotay, though, nothing would ever be the same.


End file.
